Chapter 3
Louis and Lize.
Young and in love.
Married and full of dreams.
Struck down at the prime of life.
Multiple Sclerosis.
Trigeminal Neuralgia.
New to the parent club.
Surviving day by day.
A little less young, still deeply in love.
Married, but now their dreams look a little different.
In the prime of their life, learning to reinvent themselves.
The joy of parenthood, loaded with uncertainty.
Now, it is pretty fair to sum up their lives as “stressful”, to say the least.
But the adventure was about to get notched up again! “Despite the chaos and pain that our lives had become, our love still reminded us that there is good in the world, and hope for our lives and new beginnings. This reminder came in all its glory when we found out we were pregnant with our second child,” Lize says.
And while their hearts were bursting with joy, they carried the concern of having fallen pregnant while Louis was on MS medication. Instantly this pregnancy carried a layer of stress to it.
Much like everything in their lives, they were walking the tightrope of joy and pain, anticipation and worry, forward and backward.
But they were ready for a shift, ready to take charge again. So they packed up what was left of their lives, pulled together the threads, pinched their pennies to pay for a move, and made the four-hour drive to their new life in White River.
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“It was Louis’s turn to embrace life lived alongside in-laws – one of us sick, one of us pregnant, and one of us a toddler. What a trio we made,” Lize says.
“But we were there, we had my parents available to help, we had a change of scenery and the hope that comes with new possibilities. It is hard to put into words the impact that a tangible support system has on a tired parent. There is a deep reassurance that comes with knowing that you have access to an extra set of hands for those moments when you just. Cannot. Anymore.”
This season of togetherness with Lize’s parents brought peace and a chance to breathe as they held space for the young family in more ways than they could count. And what a joy for their children to continue reaping the benefits of grandparents who invest in their little lives.
A new possibility presented itself in the pure resource that comes with building a new network.
Shortly after the move, Lize joined a Bible study group to start building a community for her little family. During the first get-together, she found herself sitting across the table from a woman who has the same Trigeminal Neuralgia disease that Louis has. And not only does she have the same disease, she also had the solution: a neurosurgeon specialising in Trigeminal Neuralgia who had helped her reach a place of no pain. She shared his number and, after getting an appointment, Louis and Lize spent the next several months driving back and forth to Pretoria once a month to do tests and adjust medication.
“Fun story, on one such trip to Pretoria, we actually sold our car in the doctor’s parking lot to help pay for the next round of bills. To say that we were living from moment to moment, would be an understatement,” Lize says.
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Within three months, this doctor had helped Louis go from barely functioning to 98% functioning. For years they had hopped from doctor to doctor, from specialist to specialist – draining their bank accounts, draining their hope, draining their energy. It took them moving all the way to White River to find the right doctor back in Pretoria.
“Who knows why it had to happen this way, but it happened, and we are thankful.”
At the next Bible-study gathering, Lize met another woman, this time one who carries the same MS diagnosis as Louis. She sees the same doctor that Louis sees in Pretoria for his MS. Another powerful connection, an inspiration, a beacon of hope. Someone who was living with the diagnosis, but actually living, in a way Louis had no longer believed possible.
Another new possibility presented itself when Lize’s childhood friend sat across from her in their lounge, swapping out war stories of how Covid had derailed their lives. Being highly pregnant did not look fantastic on a CV and Lize was not sure she could transition into an office job after working for herself for the past three years.
And yet she was once again looking at selling what was left of her photography equipment just to be able to pay for medical aid.
Just like that, the puzzle pieces started coming together. Her friend happened to have a guesthouse around the corner that was sitting empty due to Covid. She looked at Lize and said: “Friend, do not sell any more of your equipment – this is the perfect time for you to start your photography business. Use one of my empty rooms, set up a studio for yourself and start photographing newborns like you have wanted to do for so long!”
Completely blown away, Lize took a day or two to process, to talk to Louis and to come to a resounding “yes”. It was indeed time.
She picked up the phone and took her friend up on her offer. She named her business Little Miracles Photography as this is a true reflection of her two perfectly healthy little boys.
After years of struggle, it was finally time for Louis and Lize to reinvent themselves.
Now Lize spends her days shooting and her nights editing, building a business that continues to grow and has become a way of supporting her family through passion. She had excitement back in her life, not just worry and stress.
Suddenly they had mornings where Louis, who at one stage could not even get out of bed, was up before Lize, eager to get started with the day.
He started learning how to use Photoshop and helped edit some of Lize’s shoots.
Creativity reawakened and a new skill mastered. Something that adds value. Something to show the world. Something to fuel the embers of passion.
A team.
Now “in health” again and not just “in sickness”.
A flow of creativity in them both.
A way of life that holds space for the ups and downs that come with MS.
Co-parents.
Partners.
“We are still on the journey, we always will be. We are still finding our way, navigating building a business, providing for our family financially and raising children while we are at it. We still have a long list of needs, medicine to pay for, doctors, co-payments, hurdles to overcome. But we have learnt some powerful things on the road to where we are now.”
They have learnt that you should never underestimate the power of a warm beanbag.
That things can change drastically from morning to night, from hour to hour.
That the kindness of strangers can change lives.
That community can carry you through the darkest nights.
That true friendships during hard times can bond you like family.
That it is okay to simply say “thank you” when someone gifts you with money.
That it not only takes a village to raise kids, but to actually navigate life.
That nothing should be taken for granted.
That your ability to work is a gift.
That being able to play with your kids is a blessing.
That the judgmental looks are a small price to pay when keeping your kid safe means walking with them on a leash.
That sometimes you need distance to find what was right there all along.
That you can be stripped of everything, only to be built up more beautiful than ever before.
That age and health do not necessarily go hand in hand, and that life insurance can be a game changer.
That life with a chronic illness does not have to be the end of your life, your marriage, your family, your dreams.
That one day at a time is truly sometimes the best and only approach.
That there is always a rainbow after a storm, reminding you that you were never alone.
Visit Lize Leonard’s photographic studio Little Miracles Photography here. Visit Louis Leonard’s business, Buckets of Blessings, contact him on 072 601 8471 or send an email to louis@bucketsofblessings.com.
